So we were off, the four of us – my brother, his two friends, and me. My wife was against me going at first, being a weeknight, but if my brother invited me, I had to go. I invited him to my bachelor party and he came to mine so it was only fair.
The place was a bit of a dump. It had a bar in one corner, which does not serve any alcoholic beverages from what I heard. The rest of the place was fairly small, with an elevated dancing runway across the whole place. Each dancer took her turn doing her thing with the pole and taking her top and bottom off. We were seated in a row right on the runway, so each dancer stopped at every guy, showing and rubbing her vagina.
Now, I should mention that I am not a big fan of strip clubs. I’ve heard somewhere that a strip club is like a restaurant where you only get to look at the food, and I think that is a good analogy. I guess I am not as sexual as some men, since just looking does not do much for me. And looking at other men, leaned over and staring at women’s vaginas, it seemed kind of sad. And on this day, I played the part of this sad looking man.
It was an awkward position for me. I didn’t want to seem completely disinterested because this stripper in front me is trying to please me with her private parts, but I also didn’t want to seem like a complete pervert in front of my brother. And the bottom line is that I really was not interested in paying to see vaginas. But since I was seated at the runway, I had no choice but to see. And give out dollar bills. I learned quickly that as a patron, I was expected to look, and at the end, give a dollar bill. As soon as a woman bent down in front of me, I got a single ready, looked for a few seconds, and gave a dollar to the stripper. By give, I mean I put it between her breasts and have her squeeze it out of my hand. I kind of felt like I was in a zoo, and the animals know that each person will give them something to eat. Yes, that is quite demeaning but that’s what it seemed like to me. Even my brother noticed that the way I looked and gave the money screamed “yeah, here’s your dollar, now move on.”
Since this was a BYOB bar, the Best Man (BM) came prepared with champagne and beers (no hard liquor allowed). I had about three drinks because it seemed like BM was being responsible as the designated driver. I would have had a couple more if I had not been so full from dinner, but as you will see later, it was a good thing I didn’t drink any more.
I did not think we would end up staying too late, but we stayed until about 1am, which I was happy about since that meant that I made a good decision about working from home the next day. A couple of guys disappeared one at a time for lap dances at one point. As for me, I had to deal with a stripper who kept saying “hello” and “thank you” to me in Chinese. Ehh, not worth correcting.
Now, I will explain the night’s highlight. It was something I never would have imagined. First, the bachelor, my brother, was called up to the runway. They provided him with a chair to sit on. And then, it began. Three women started working on him at once. And it was much more painful than sexual. I will not go into detail because I don’t think my brother wants people to know about this, but it was quite a sight to behold. I cannot imagine anyone not into S&M kind of kinky sex acts to be interested in getting something like this. Here are some words that may paint a picture in your head: vagina in the face, kicks to the groin, belt spanking, ripped underwear. This was definitely more of a show for the observers than the participant.
But this is where my instinct as a brother kicked in. While other friends were completely enjoying themselves, I started to get worried. Is he really in pain? Does he want this to stop right now? Does he want someone to stop this? Should I do something? At a certain point, I stopped enjoying the show and started worrying. When he went to thr bathroom afterwards, I followed him in to make sure he was okay. Yes, he was, but he certainly did not enjoy it. But I think he was a good sport about it. And I am glad I was there because there is no way I would have known that this had occurred if I was not there.
He went back ton his seat and we stayed for another hour or so. He was seated a few seats away from me, so I wasn’t aware of how much drinking was going on. At the end of the night, it was up to me to drive them home. Seeing my brother drunk was definitely a first for me. But I didn’t get to see his fun drunk side. By the time we were going home, he was doing his best to hold it in. I was also doing by best to hold it in, but for me, it was #1. “You’re enjoying this aren’t you?” he asked, referring to me witnessing him drunk. I said I was more worried. It was true, I was worried. But I was also enjoying it. Not just because he was drunk, but because I had never seen him drunk before. I was enjoying it because I was allowed to be a part of this moment in his life. I was seeing him drunk for the first time, I saw him getting pummeled by strippers, and I got to see him interact with his friends. I had now seen him in a light in which I had never seen him before, and for that I was glad. In a small way, I felt closer to him.
When we got home, he asked me to bring him some water, which I was glad to do for him. Afterwards, I brought in his best man to sleep on our couch, and I joined my waiting wife in bed.
What a night. Considering how he doesn’t tell me about his life, I have to be a part of it to know about it. I am glad I got to share this experience with him, even if we may not talk about it again for the rest of our lives.
Stand Up: The Blog 