Wasted Week

This week, I am only working on Monday, Tuesday, and Friday.  This means I could stay in NY until late on Tuesday and Friday without having to worry about getting up early the next day.  With this in mind, I e-mailed for spots at Tuesday’s show and Thursday’s show.

Whoop, what?  Wife wants to go take professional photos with our son?  And it has to be Tuesday?  Okay, cancel the Tuesday spot.  And a text, what?  My brother wants to meet for Christmas (Sunday)?  Can’t, busy with wife’s family.  And wife works on Saturday and you work Friday?  I guess it’ll have to be on Thursday.  Cancel that one.

I don’t mind that sometimes comedy has to take a backseat to my familial duties, especially during the Christmas season.  But it sure is annoying that both of them happened to coincide with both days I e-mailed for spots.  I could have gone yesterday but my wife’s parents came over yesterday.  So no comedy this week.  Hopefully I’ll make lemons out of lemonade by studying more.

In other news, looks like I have my first subscriber.  I can only do so much while blogging from my phone, but I think the subscriber is a comedy podcasting site.  Thanks for following and I’ll return the favor when I get a chance.

Will Return Soon

Once again, perhaps not surprisingly, I have been away again from comedy.  My son was born 6 weeks ago, and I’ve been coming straight home from work to help with the baby.  I also have an exam to take in two and a half weeks that I must pass.

But after that, I plan on hitting the streets again once a week.  The other 6 days? P90X, hopefully.

Smoking for a Reason

At the beginning of the year, I quit smoking.  That lasted about a month and a half before I had another one.  Since then, I went a few weeks, then had one, a couple more weeks, then a pack, and such.  My last pack, bought when I thought I was going to be drinking a lot (as if that makes it any better), was finished two weeks ago at Village Lantern.  After the show, I went outside and lit the last cigarette.  When I did that, one of the comics saw me and asked me for one.  I did not have any more so I couldn’t give her one.

Last night, I realized maybe smoking could help me.  I want to meet other comics.  No, I think I need to meet other comics, for networking purposes.  But I don’t know how to approach any of them.  My first plan to start socializing more is to thank the host after the show.  My hope is that this shows I am a good guy and also not completely a wallflower.  My second plan now is to have a cigarette after the show.  Why?  Well, after the show, comics talk to one another.  Since I can’t just sit there doing nothing with no one else to talk to, I leave.  Well, maybe smoking can be the excuse for sticking around.  After the show, I will, or pretend to, write in my notepad, maybe organize some jokes and such.  Then I will slowly mosey on outside and have a cigarette, hoping maybe being there would give me more opportunities to talk to other comics.

Being around is how I got to talk to the guys last night.  As usual, I left after the show.  But then, I walked around a little bit and thought of this plan.  I bought a pack and walked back towards the open mic, and that’s when I got to start talking to them.

When my wife started her job, she said smoking breaks were when all (or most) of the nurses did their socializing.  I guess I will have to use that excuse also.  But I’m going to minimize my smoking outside the comedy scene, maybe one or two per day at most.  Let’s see how this plan goes.

Babysitting

I spent the past two nights babysitting my nephew after work.  Because of him, I’ve been leaving work at 5pm instead of the usual 6 – 6:30.  Now, I have to make up those hours during the rest of the week.  That means I can’t get out of work on time for some of the other open mics.  That sucks, I want to keep on going.  Keep the momentum going.

But babysitting him also struck a reality in me.  This is what having a kid would be like.  My nephew likes spending time with me and wonders why I can’t come over more often.  I feel bad that I can’t either.  Will I still be able to drag my ass to the City for comedy with my own baby waiting for me at home?  I don’t know.  When it comes to my baby, I don’t know what to expect.  What I think would happen may be completely different from what will happen.

It’s a boy, by the way.

Time is Ticking

The 2010-2011 version of NJ Devils weren’t one of the best teams in the league.  But the team had a solid core of good players, with a $100 million scorer and the all-time winningest goalie.  Although the team was manned by a rookie coach and one of the all-time Devils, it was still expected to make the playoffs again.

But the season took off on the wrong foot, and the slump took the team all the way to the bottom of the standings after half a season, with the team having lost 3 out of 4 games.  At one point, they were 27 points out of the playoffs, and with the record for being the furthest out before making the playoffs being 11 points, a historic comeback was necessary.

Enter Jacques Lemaire, the coach that led the team to its first championship in 1995, and coached the team again last year before retiring.  Once he got on board, the Devils started to turn things around.  They won almost 90% of the next 30 or so games played, and pulled up to within 6 points of a playoff spot.  They still had to win about 7 or 8 of the remaining 10 – 11 games, but I still believed.  I believed enough to buy tickets to last night’s game.  I was hoping this could be a playoff clinching game.  But even though I knew that would be highly, highly unlikely, with the team still having 2 games left in the schedule, I still hoped it would be an important game in the hunt for the playoffs.

Well, I must’ve jinxed them because not long after I bought the tickets, the team started losing consecutive games.  It became more and more necessary for the teams above the Devils to lose.  But that didn’t matter as the team lost its way to elimination.  They were out.  And I had tickets to a game between two teams not making the playoffs, playing out the string.

I figured there was a chance this could happen when I bought the tickets.  But there were 2 reasons why I bought the tickets anyway.  First reason was that the seats were very good for the price.  We were seated in the 4th row from the ice, near one of the goals.  Sure, the seats weren’t right by the ice, but they were still excellent.  And I got the tickets for $50 on StubHub.  I’ve always sat in the upper levels to a Devils game in the past, and I don’t think I would ever goo back, at least not if I can help it.

Second reason is my wife.  Having a pregnant wife makes a man seek out a bit more excitement.  I figured we would not have a chance to go out as often once the baby came, so this game was another chance to get out of the house.  I’ve been doing that more lately, as we spent the day in New York this past weekend.  I want to go on at least two more New York day trips, with Broadway shows and famous restaurants.  Time is ticking.  Pretty soon, this freedom we’ve been taking for granted will be taken away.  Be assured, I don’t mean this in a bad way, but I plan on taking advantage of these next few months to do all the things we’ve been putting off.

By the way, the game was still pretty fun, and the Devils won 4-2 over the Toronto Maple Leafs.

Bro Series: Outro

Okay, I’m tired of talking about my brother, but I feel that the series needed some sort of a closure.

My brother posted a status update on his Facebook page today, where he referred to his wife.  That was weird to see.  During the wedding, it didn’t hit me that my younger brother is now a married man, but that one simple status update did it for me.  My brother… now has a wife… just like how I have a wife.  They’ll be living together, sleeping together, and in a year or two, making babies together.  I guess I can get used to that.

Before my brother even met his wife, I always thought his wife would be a very important factor in our relationship going forward.  Since my brother rarely says something, I figured it would have to be up to her for us to meet, and find out how his life is going.  I think that worked out pretty well – his new wife seems to like me, my wife, and my family, and tells us a lot about their life together.  I think she can be a good influence on him.

Marty told me about his two cousins who are brothers.  They did not really speak with one another, like me and my brother.  But their wives became very close and they became a connection for them.  I think we are in a similar situation.  I still have a small bit of grudge for the way he has treated me in the past, but I think I just need to get over it, and accept my brother with love whenever he opens up to me.  I am looking forward to living with him and his new wife for the next few months – that may determine how close we will remain once we move out.

Do I love him?  Of course.  Will I ever say it to him?  Heck no.  I may be sensitive, but am still a man.

Bro Series: Wedding Day II

Sorry about the delay in posting the second part of the wedding day.  The past few days have been a bit hectic, with my parents getting ready to go back to Korea and finally doing so yesterday.  Something post-worthy actually happened today, but I will save that for another day, as I want don’t want to interrupt the Bro Series.

#8. Kirkpatrick Chapel, New Brunswick.  When we rolled up to the wedding chapel, almost all the guests were already in their seats and the wedding party was already lined up and ready for their roles.  The flower girls were armed with their bubble guns, and the moms were ready to light the candles on fire.  Shoot, the fire.  The night before, during the rehearsal, moms practiced with the candle lighters.  However, I saw in the morning that the new lighters worked a different way.  I was worried about the moms not knowing how to light the candles, so I had to go check on the lighters… located at the altar… in front of all the guests.  Due to the faces in the crowd familiar enough to be recognized but not enough to say hello, I did not want to go up there by myself, but I figured I had to do so to avoid something going wrong.  So I went up there and tested out the lighters, and then went to the moms to let them know how to use it.  “Oh, we already practiced with it,” they said.  Oops.

There was a portion when we had a girl sing a song during the ceremony.  When this was going on, my brother turned around and kept looking in my direction.  I gave him some funny looks, which elicited a smile, but the funny looks were genuine because I really had no idea why he was staring at me and not at the pastor marrying them.  I found out later that the singer was behind me and I was pretty much in between the singer and my brother.  Ohh, so that explains it.

Wedding ended, and I ran a few errands, like giving money to people hired for the wedding, like the photographers, pastor, and the harpist.  I disassembled the candlesticks to take them to the reception hall.  Again, I was enjoying the fact that I was helping out.

Watching my brother get married didn’t hit any emotional notes with me.  Nothing like a deep realization that my brother was finally getting hitched.  I guess in my mind, I had already accepted.  But the wedding was beautiful and it went off without a hitch, save for the flower girls who did not shoot a single bubble from their guns (flower petals were not allowed).

#9. Stone House, Warren.  The limo ride was enjoyable, but not because I was in a limo.  It was enjoyable because I was seated next to the new couple, and I was sharing this moment with them as we checked out each other’s wedding rings and plans for the rest of the night.

Reception hall was nice, although the bridal suite wasn’t much of a room, let alone a suite.  I was looking forward to being in the special room reserved for the wedding party with our own spread of food away from the commoners, but there really wasn’t much at the suite.  So I spent my time saying hello to my wife’s family, my parents’ friends, and some of the familiar faces.  My brother’s new wife knows quite a lot of people – I saw people from my high school and college, although she attended neither.  The cocktail hour flew by as I kept busy talking to all those people, and also fetching drinks for them.  I think my nephew enjoyed ordering his Coke-and-Sprite concoction from the bar.

Bridal party was introduced to the old intro music Chicago Bulls used during the Michael Jordan era.  To fit the music, we planned shoulder bumps and jumping chest bumps.  I admit, I was having so much fun, I don’t even remember the music.  And when the new husband and wife was introduced, I was glad to be so close to the action.

I spent the rest of the evening with my parents, wife, nephew, and drinking a hugh glass of whiskey with my friend.  I barely had time to eat, and having a few drinks in me made the time fly by.

After the cake was cut and icing decorated on the couple’s faces, it was time for me to say goodbye and go home.  All in all, it was a very busy, but very satisfying and enjoyable day.

Bro Series: Wedding Day I

And now, the finale, of both this Bro Series, as well as my brother’s bachelor life.  Contrary to my own wedding, this wedding involved many locales.  At my wedding, we just had two, make-up studio and wedding/reception hall where we got ready and photos were taken.  For my bro, I will count them up as I go.

#1. Flower Shop, Leonia.  We drove up here to pick up the corsages, bouquets, and the bouteneers, which I guarantee is misspelled.  My brother and I drove up here and enjoyed a nice drive and small chitchat.  When he is in a good mood, I enjoy spending time with my brother.

#2. Groomsman’s House, Carteret.  We drove down here and met with the other two groomsman, just for the sake of getting our getting ready photos taken as we got into our tuxes.  I’ve worn my tux enough times to know what to do with cufflinks and the cufflink-equivalents that go on the front of your shirt, but not my brother.  I put them on for him, as the photographer took his shots.  I enjoyed this moment because I don’t get many chances to help out my brother.  Last year, during a severe snowstorm, I was home early in the morning because it was either the weekend, or our office was closed.  There was already over a foot of snow on the ground, but my brother was on his way home from work.  I got out there and cleared a parking spot for him, just as he pulled up.  I could tell he was appreciative of what I did, and I remember that because, as I said, I don’t get to help him very much.  It is also why I enjoyed taking him home after the bachelor party.

#3. Hyatt Hotel, New Brunswick.  Several of the wedding guests were staying here, and a suite was also booked here because this is where everyone was getting their make up done.  I met up with my mom, who was here for the make up, and my wife, who drove her here.  We had to stop in because my brother was also getting his make up.  It was a nice little break, seeing my wife taking care of my parents in my place.

#4. Stone House, Warren.  We had to drop off my brother’s car so the four men once again set off, this time for the reception hall.  After parking our cars, we got into an overstretched Escalade limousine.  Gotta admit, I have not been inside a limo that many times.  During my senior prom, I just got there with a friend and our dates in his almost-luxury car, Nissan Maxima.  Two years later as a college sophomore, I went to another high school prom with a girl I had broken up with a few months prior, and that was the first and only time I had been in a limousine.  Then, I served as a groomsman at a couple of weddings, one where I don’t recall a limo being used, and another were I declined to get into the limo to drive my current wife and then-girlfriend.  At my own wedding, limo was unnecessary because everything was done in one spot.  Closest I came to getting in a limo was at my wife’s brother’s wedding a few years ago, when I actually surprised them with a limo.  The married couple and their immediate family members got to ride in it, but unfortunately, there wasn’t enough room for me, so I drove behind them.  Maybe I should have gone with the 14-person limo and not the 10, but I did save money.

#5. Hyatt Hotel, New Brunswick.  Back to the hotel to pick up the now camera-ready bride and her bridesmaids.  I had briefly met them the night before at the rehearsal dinner but I did not really know them that well.  I hoped it wouldn’t be awkward and that we would have a good time.  Bumming a cigarette from them did help break the ice, and it also helped that they met my pregnant wife at the hotel.

#6. Princeton University, Princeton.  The limo took us down here to take our pre-wedding photos.  I admit, it was not a bad place for photos.  At one point, the photographer asked each groosman to approach the groom, and then do something embarrassing to him.  I did what only an older brother could do, and grabbed his groin.  Then I did a very older brotherly thing and gave him a noogie.  The hardest part of the photo shoot was when we were standing on a pillar about 2 1/2 feet off the ground, and the photographer asked us to jump as high as we could, do a pose mid-air, and land without looking at the ground.  It wasn’t easy landing without looking while wearing tuxedo shoes, but I guess we pulled it off.

#7. Hyatt Hotel, New Brunswick.  Back to the Hyatt for bathroom breaks because we would go directly into the chapel for the ceremony and the bride was to remain in the limo.

I just wrote up quick summaries of the wedding and the reception, but I don’t think their brevity did the events any justice.  So I deleted them, and will continue them tomorrow.  I’ve been typing for an hour now on this Droid so that’ll be enough for today.

Bro Series: Hyung

It’s not always the case that I’m the one waiting for my brother to open up to me.  I do have pride when I deal with him.  I don’t always want to be the one showing interest, so I’ve learned not to.  I don’t really ask him questions about his life because he doesn’t ask about mine.  I don’t really greet him when he comes home or say goodbye when he leaves because he doesn’t really do those things.  It takes effort for me to act this way but for him, it comes naturally.  I know it’s not just me, his wife knows he acts like this, too.

I’ve had to act this way because there were times in the past when I’ve asked him a question and he responded with a dismissive one-word answer.  There were a few times when my question was not even acknowleged as he completely ignored me.  I’ve tried to passively get an apology out of him but he has yet to do so because I don’t think he thinks there is anything wrong with that.  My parents see us interact and want me to be more initiative with him, but there is a limit to how much interest and affection I can show when there’s nothing coming back.

I know this is just the way he is, and even though he doesn’t show it, I know he cares.  We’ve been to a few Mets games together.  I think he even bought a brick with my and his name on it, on display at Citi Field.  He hasn’t said anything but I saw a picture of it lying around his room.  I’m guessing he thought we would have gone to Citi Field by now, which I still haven’t.

I have wanted to be a good older brother to him.  I wanted to be the person he can come to for advice when he needed to make an important, or even trivial, decision.  I wanted to be the person he can come to when he needed someone to rely on.  And at the same time, I wanted us to be good friends, having fun, open and honest with each other.  It is a shame that most of the past 2 1/2 years that I’ve lived with him has felt like living in a dorm with an acquaintance, with him holing up in his room and me in mine.  But even if I can’t get treated like an older brother, I’m glad he still calls me an older brother.  In Korea, a younger brother calls his older brother “hyung”.  He rarely calls me this since, well, he doesn’t call me that much to begin with, and “hey” has become a more common attention getter as we speak English almost all the time.  But whenever he does call me “hyung”, I smile a little on the inside.

Bro Series: Wedding Rehearsal

Wedding rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner were scheduled for the night after the bachelor’s party, which was the Friday night before the wedding.  On this night, I would get to find out where I stand among the groomsmen.  In my wedding, I had one Best Man (unlike Danny Tanner, who had two), and three groomsmen.  Or I had four groomsmen total, one of whom was the Best Man.  I think even numbers are the way to go because in photos, it’s easier for the groom to be centered around his men.  Anyway, in my wedding, I had my three friends in front, and my brother last.  The reason I put him last was because I didn’t feel like we had a close enough relationship.  He was in the bridal party only because he was my brother.  Not that I felt obligated to do so – I wanted my brother as one of my groomsmen.  Or, at least, I wanted to be a person who was close enough to his brother that he would be in the bridal party.

(Were have you been, Deepthroat?  Can’t say I’ve missed you.  I hope this is the last time I’m sharing this bus with you for a long time.)

My brother’s wedding involved one maid-of-honor and three bridesmaids.  It was an uneven setting, however, because my brother had one best man and two groomsmen, one of which was me.  I assumed I would be last, but it turns out I was in the middle.  I was a bit surprised by that, but I realized that was due to a reason more practical than sentimental.  In the wedding chapel, each groosman stood on a step to the altar, with the next one two steps down.  So it actually looks better if taller people stand at the bottom, and the other groosman was about 2 to 3 inches taller than me.  The bride’s side had done the same thing, with the tallest bridesmaid at the bottom.  A perfectly reasonable explanation, and one not unexpected from my brother, which was fine.

During the dinner, my family was seated with her family, along with the bride and the groom.  Watching my brother get along with her side of the family, whom I had not met before, it made me realize he was now gaining another family.  In a way, this kind of felt like we were growing apart.  Well, I think his new wife likes my family as well so I hope she keeps him grounded to our side of the family while still fulfilling his obligations on her side.